Archive for the ‘Fantasy sports’ Category

Some fathers and sons go to baseball games – we have lightsaber battles

March 23, 2012

Not too long ago, my son (Ethan Capps) mentioned that he found a blog post about himself while searching on Google.

I guess we should stop for a minute and note the apparent science behind the fact that – without any suggestion from me – he had the idea to Google himself. It’s a feat that surely belongs in a science journal.

Anyway, he requested more blogs about him. Apparently, reading about what his dad thinks about sports is, well, rather less than thrilling.

So this one is about the boy.

Sometimes, I feel like I’m missing out a little in terms of having the traditional, sports-heavy father/son relationship with him.

But what we do share is an almost-daily lightsaber duel.

He has an extensive collection of weaponry, including what I estimate to be about 10 official, light-up, honest-to-goodness Star Wars lightsabers.

I wield the red one, favored by Darth Vader, while he uses the blue one – which I believe was inspired by Obi Wan Kenobi.

So, we wander around the house, swinging feverishly at each other with plastic swords. He occasionally cuts off my arm or leg – then gives it back to me by pointing his finger and saying “robotic arm” or “robotic leg.”

We cite movie lines, making up a few things along the way. One interesting thing to note is the fact that, not only am I apparently some kind of Sith Lord, but I’m a “chinny-chin-chin Sith Lord,” which is a reference to my goatee (which is my chinny-chin-chin, so I’m told).

He wins these battles, usually somewhere near 8 p.m. (bath time) by various methods. Usually, he runs me through, giving me a version of the speech Obi Wan gave Anakin in Episode III as he stands over me.

But sometimes, he convinces me to reject the Dark Side of the Force and become a Jedi.

We’ve been calling them “Friendship Endings.”

Reminds me of Mortal Kombat.

So, while I’m not coaching third base at a Little League game, I am fighting for control of a galaxy far, far away…

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Caught up in a fantasy

March 25, 2009

It’s a sickness.

It must be.

No right-minded person would willingly sign up for more than six months of daily headaches, the stress of dealing with obilque injuries and the travel issues regarding red-eyes from Louisville to Cincinnati.

I’m talking fantasy baseball, of course, and foolishly, I’ve signed up for two leagues.

Sigh.

My word, what have I done.

Anyway, there are hundreds of places you can go that will tell you that Hanley Ramirez and Cole Hamels (elbow issues notwithstanding) are studs.

But here are a couple of guys flying below the radar that you may want to consider:

5. Wilson Betemit, Chicago White Sox– He’s not exactly guaranteed a starting gig, but he’s eligible at first, third and short in my leagues. He’s raking this spring (.326, 5 HR, 15 RBI) and if he carries that over, the White Sox will find at-bats for him.

4. Michael Bourn, Houston Astros– I hate to list him here, since he’s batting under the Mendoza Line this spring. But he’s faster than an AIG executive leaving a congressional hearing. You can’t steal first, but Houston is going to give him a look in center and near the top of their lineup. He may be worth a gamble.

3. Dave Bush, Milwaukee Brewers – He’s never going to lead your staff in strikeouts, but he’s looking good this spring (2-0, 2.70 ERA in 20 innings) and he’s a solid back-of-the-rotation guy.

2. Paul Malohm, Pittsburgh Pirates – I know he’s a Pirate, but he’s on fire this spring, posting a 2-0 record with a 0.46 ERA in 19.2 innings. I wouldn’t bank on a high-win total, but it could be a breakout year for him.

1. Todd Helton, Colorado Rockies– How far has this slugger fallen? He went undrafted in both of my leagues, probably because of his subpar 2008. But, after back surgery, he’s killing the ball this spring (.348, 4 HR, 9 RBI). If he’s healthy, he could be a steal.

A shout out

November 18, 2008

My wife is the coolest lady in the world.

She calls me this morning at 9:21 a.m. with the following:

“We play this week. Find us a sports bar in Raleigh. I promise I’ll be nice this time.”

She’s referring to the beatdown and subsequent trash-talking session I had to endure back in week two where she not only ripped my underwhelming fantasy football team, but ragged me about it in front of my friend Tina and my former friend, Bryan Hanks.

(Editor’s note: I say former because the man won’t return my phone calls anymore. Clearly I lack the stature needed to converse with editors-in-chief)

But even though she was a little hard on me that day, I feel compelled to point out that my wife rocks.

I listen to stories every day about how some of my friends don’t like what their wives make them do. A lot of people spend a lot of time complaining about marriage.

Not me. My wife is the best. She’s smart, marrying me notwithstanding. She’s beautiful. She’s a good mother.

And she likes sitting in sports bars watching football.

What could be better?

Exhibit A

July 23, 2008

I’ve long suspected that it takes a certain amount of lunacy to play and enjoy fantasy baseball.

Now, I’m sure.

Yesterday was an average day. I was having an average drive home, flipping around on the magic radio and checking out the latest on one of those ESPN SportsCenter radio breaks.

Then, I heard the news.

Jon Rauch, who was closing in Washington, was traded to the Diamondbacks yesterday for a minor league second baseman and a Heath Ledger poster.

“Crap,” I said aloud, even though I was by myself at the time.

Why is this news important? It’s simple.

Rauch is on my fantasy baseball team, providing me saves as I try to climb the ranks. Now, he’s on his way to Phoenix where his save opportunites might be limited to shagging loose balls in his shootarounds with one of the other 6-10 guys in baseball, Randy Johnson.

OK, maybe simple isn’t the right word.

So, having watched more Nationals games than is deemed healthy by the American Medical Association, I started racking my brain. I was about three miles from home, and I had to come up with the right guy to pick up.

I mean, the Nats are horrid, but saves are saves.

So I get home, wait for what seems like an eternity for my laptop to sputter to life and then cruise over to our league’s page.

I scan the recent transactions and smile, seeing that no one has made a play on the future Nats closer.

Maybe that’s because no one’s sure who that might be.

I scan the usual sources, ESPN, Roto Times, Yahoo! and come up with nothing.

So I took a guess. Joel Hanrahan is the guy in the pen I think has the best stuff. So I snagged him.

Turns out, I was right. He will be getting the save chances for Washington, for now anyway.

So, it’s official. I’m a nut job.

In other news, gravity is still holding me in my chair.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled Internet browsing.