Monday musings

My wife kicked my rear end in fantasy football this weekend, likely ending my playoff hopes.

On the plus side, we spent the better part of Sunday in a pretty good sports bar (Sammy’s in Raleigh), so it could have been worse.

Anyway, here’s what’s on my mind this morning:

1. The Colts got a huge win in San Diego last night. Yeah, the Chargers are not exactly high wattage this year, but they lit up the Jets and Patriots in prime-time home games this year. That 23-20 win is huge for the Colts, who most folks had written off just a few weeks back.

2. Texas Tech got exposed Saturday night. Hope you didn’t take the Red Raiders and seven like some people I could name…

3. Does anybody want to win the ACC? Other than Boston College, it doesn’t look like anyone wants to go to Tampa for the ACC title game.

4. I’m wondering if Dabo Swinney can hold on to the Clemson job if he beats South Carolina. Personally, I think they’re going after a big name no matter what.

5. The BCS is a sham. Oklahoma is going to play for the national championship, but Texas is 10 points better than the Sooners on a neutral field? The one thing I’m hoping for out of an Obama administration is a football playoff. This nonsense must end.

A shout out

My wife is the coolest lady in the world.

She calls me this morning at 9:21 a.m. with the following:

“We play this week. Find us a sports bar in Raleigh. I promise I’ll be nice this time.”

She’s referring to the beatdown and subsequent trash-talking session I had to endure back in week two where she not only ripped my underwhelming fantasy football team, but ragged me about it in front of my friend Tina and my former friend, Bryan Hanks.

(Editor’s note: I say former because the man won’t return my phone calls anymore. Clearly I lack the stature needed to converse with editors-in-chief)

But even though she was a little hard on me that day, I feel compelled to point out that my wife rocks.

I listen to stories every day about how some of my friends don’t like what their wives make them do. A lot of people spend a lot of time complaining about marriage.

Not me. My wife is the best. She’s smart, marrying me notwithstanding. She’s beautiful. She’s a good mother.

And she likes sitting in sports bars watching football.

What could be better?

NFL thoughts

Sunday was a good day’s worth of fun in the National Football League. Let’s hit the highlights, shall we?

Depression does Dallas – Is it wrong that I derive serious, tingly-sensation worthy joy from watching Dallas empty both of its six-shooters into its feet on a weekly basis?

Seriously, who in Dallas decided that it would be a good idea to back up Tony Romo with Brad Johnson and Brooks Bollinger? Those two couldn’t get a game in Detroit right now, and that’s saying something.

Of course, it would be unfair to lay all the blame under center. The offensive line has been underwhelming and the defense has been injury-riddled and uninspired. Did you see anyone interested in making a tackle on a Giant ball carrier yesterday? Me neither.

The so-called America’s Team hasn’t won a playoff game since 1996. At this rate, that won’t be changing this season.

And then there was one- As in winless teams, since Cincinnati finally got in the win column yesterday.

Detroit, on the other hand, is still chasing the all-time record of futility set by the Tampa Bay Bucs, who went 0-14 as an expansion team in the late 70s.

So, after the Lions come-from-ahead loss to the Bears, will they win a game this year? They close with Jacksonville (maybe), at Carolina (no), Tampa Bay (maybe), Tennessee (no), Minnesota (maybe), at Indy (no), New Orleans (no) and at Green Bay (no).

Surely they’ll get one, won’t they?

And there’s still one – As in unbeaten teams with Tennessee’s 19-16 overtime win over Green Bay. As we know, only one team, the 2007 Patriots, finished a regular season with a perfect record.

Can they do it?

Heck no. The Titans are a very good team, but their closing stretch is too strong. My guess is that they’ll fall this week in Chicago.

Manic Monday – And this week isn’t over, as Washington and Pittsburgh will tangle tonight in the nation’s capital. In 17 of the last 18 presidential elections (only failing to do so in 2004), the Redskins have correctly predicted the winner of the election. If they win, the incumbent does also. If they lose, so will the party in office.

So, if John McCain has any hope of winning, the Redskins need to beat the Steelers tonight.

Hey, it makes as much sense as anything else politically these days.